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Seminole, Texas, United States
"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill

Tuesday, June 13

D I E T is a &*$(^*#!!! Four-Letter Word!

Holy Mother of Pete please help me survive this which is the dankest hell I have yet to experience in my entire life!

So I signs myself up for one of the more popular "diet programs" making the rounds these days. Y'know, the kind where all of your meals are pre-packaged and pre-eliminated of any taste whatsoever.

At the moment I am enjoying (and I used that term LOOSELY) my daily Snack of choice and it is requiring no less than 32 ounces of unsweetened tea to wash this 1 ounce brownie sponge down my gullet.

Now my tea is all gone. Trust me, I have absolutely NO qualms about sucking on the lime slice for moisture at this point.

HAAAAAAACK! For the love of mercy it is INSANE the things middle-aged females will do to lose a few pounds.

If I don't lose at least 15 pounds on this cursed earth diet, somebody's gonna lose a leg. Maybe even a whole chicken!

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