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Seminole, Texas, United States
"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill

Monday, March 7

Flashback: Aaron Watson @ Bertram Smokehaus

First let me say that I am NOT in a good mood about this blog. It's pretty much a slam but it has also been a beeyotch to get posted. I did it TWICE this week and both times gremlins booted me off before I could save it. Crap.

And if you think that is any indication that I need to be sweeter in this post or it will get kicked back too, you're wrong. I'm determined to be as gripey as I wanna be about this particular issue.

Here goes. We went to the Bertram Smokehaus this past Saturday night to see Aaron Watson. He was TERRIFIC. He sounded great (when I could hear him over the crowd noise) and he was an absolute doll when he came off stage to sign autographs and take pictures with his fans. I definitely want to see him again. Only not at Bertram.

Enough about Aaron. Let's get to the b***h-fest. The show was advertised to start at 7pm. The opening act didn't come on until after 8:30. That makes this next fact even more aggravating. There was NO PLACE to sit. The two picnic tables to the side of the stage were "reserved" so the rest of us were left to stand for 4-5 hours. No where in the advertisements did it say anything about "bring your own furniture." Except for the complete lack of seating, the venue is really nice. It is a patio next to an old hotel/restaurant (which I will talk more about in a minute) with a gazebo stage. There is also a covered pavilion on the other side of the patio with a big bar and some pool tables. Great set up for outdoor music. And the weather was beautiful.

What was it about this place that has me disinterested in ever going there again? The crowd.

I have never in my life been at a public event where people were so totally and completely rude. Not only were they SO LOUD that you could barely hear Aaron singing, standing in line and waiting to be next was apparently not something any of them were familiar with either. There was one guy I seriously wanted to punch in the jewels - I had been standing in line for 20 WHOLE MINUTES when he walks up, winks at the bargirl and gives her his order. WTH? Not a single gentleman in the place (except for my husband and probably Aaron).

The third time, yes third time, I went to get a drink, I finally went in to the restaurant's bar to stand in line. It was a little bit long but the bartenders seemed to be keeping it moving and orderly. I walked in and got in line, a girl got in line behind me (volunteer firewoman hence Fire Girl), then Drunk Dude came in behind her, and finally Blue Turd (asshole wearing a blue shirt) got in line. I strike up a conversation with Drunk Dude and Fire Girl and we start talking about the building. Apparently Drunk Dude is a history buff because he knew all sorts of stuff about the old building. Okay, I'm no scholar but the building was pretty much laid out like a big open restaurant (saloon?) with the second floor landing going around the room with about 12 rooms upstairs. There was a big double staircase at the end of the room and a big long mirror on one wall. Seeing as how the building sat next to the railroad tracks, I assumed it was originally built as a hotel/restaurant or saloon/hotel or something like that. Well, Drunk Dude dissuaded me of that particular notion right quick. "No no no, this here was origly a yumber yard." Yumber yard? Oh, he meant lumber yard. Okay, I'm with ya - drunkbonics. So I asked Drunk Dude, "But what about the rooms upstairs? This really looks like it was built to be a hotel with a restaurant or saloon." He blinked at me like five times then said, "Noooooooooooo, it was a YUMBER YARD."

Okay, okay. It was a yumber yard. Because they always kept lumber upstairs in little rooms back then. Whatever.

Fire Girl and I just kind of look at each other. He's drunk but short fat and belligerent. We like him. Then I notice that all of sudden, Blue Turd is standing right next to me. EXCUUUUUUUUUUSE ME?!!!??! I. Do. Not. Think. So.

"Where do you think you're going?" I ask of Blue Turd.

"I'm just standing in line."

"And you're gonna stand your a** at the back of the line where you came in at." I was in NO MOOD to deal with this poo for a THIRD time.

Once I got through cussin him, I turned around and looked at the couple in front of me. They looked at me like, "Oh no, don't make eye contact with her. She's insane, she's insane. Should we go? I think we should go. Let's go."

I just smiled at them and calmly said, "I have stood in line tonight for a total of about 45 minutes and I have yet to get a drink because of jerks like him slitherin around and trying to cut in line. I really need a drink. Don't you think I need a drink?"

They both vigorously nodded in agreement: Yes yes yes you need a drink.

I thought so.

When I look back at Drunk Dude swaying behind me, he's giving me that wide open eyeballs rolling around look that says, "I just came in for a beer. I don't even know you people."

When I make it up to the bar, Drunk Dude taps me on the shoulder and says, "I think you mighta scarred him. I dunno where he went."

Where'd who go? Oh, gee. Looks like Blue Turd got outta line and left. Nice.

So I get my drink, go back outside and stand next to the husband for another 2.5 hours and finally get my picture with Aaron.

I'm blaming the rude crowd on the fact that 99% of them were from UT. Liberal outhouse. Guns Up!

Funniest thing of the night: Aaron's sound board had one of those big red Easy buttons from Staples sitting right in the middle of it. Hilarious.


Simply Suthern said...

I prolly miss out on a lot of good blog stuff by not going to bars but I never enjoyed drunk rude crowds.

jLow said...

We really prefer to go to concerts that are at outdoor venues or festivals. But sometimes we have to go to a bar to somebody good. And it really doesn't matter if it's a bar or not, people will bring booze where ever. At this concert, it was definitely an age issue. Young adults who obviously never had any manners taught to them. I can hold my own with somebody trying to cut in line but the LOUDNESS of the crowd was horrible. There was an entire empty street outside the gate where they could have stood and been loud while people inside the gate could have heard the music better.