Why is it that all of my smart-aleck remarks about others somehow always come back and bite me in the a$$?
Case in point: I have on numerous occasions made some hilarious comments about redneck chicks who wear shorts and steel-toed boots. With my timing and forked tongue, I can come up with quite the zingers. Apparently the Guy Upstairs is not so appreciative of my smarmy sense of humor because most of the time it does not go without some kind of "acknowledgment."
The most recent acknowledgment to come my way happened on Tuesday evening last week. Hubby and I decided to do a little clean up around the new horse trough and clear out some softball-sized rocks before the horses stepped and twisted their legs. Well, one rock in particular was not coming out of the ground as easy as it should so I grabbed a metal-pronged rake to "pick" it out. Now, here's the funny part. I'm doing all this "farmin work" in flip flops. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
I bet I don't have to tell you what happened next.
You guessed it - - the rake skipped off the rock and one of the prongs went straight into my foot between two of my toes. prunk!! It punctured a hole right next to my second toe and went about an inch into my foot. I didn't scream or holler but Hubby saw it happen and he looked at me like he was waiting for me to start screaming bloody murder. What I did say was . . . "hmmm, that's not good." Hubby was starting to freak and wanted me to go to the ER for stitches but I calmed him down while I hobbled on one foot into the house to wash it off and survey the damage.
Once I got it cleaned off it was evident that I only had a puncture wound and the bleeding had subsided so (hopefully) I didn't hit a main vein. I'm not going to say it didn't hurt like son of a gun but it hurt less than I expected. I got up the next morning and went to our local clinic and got a tetanus shot (which, by the way, hurt worse than my attempt to skewer my tootsie).
The funnest part of this ordeal has been the colorful characteristics my toe has taken on in the last 6 days. It went from light blue to light purple to dark purple/red to dark blue/purple to a mottled purple/blue/brown/yellow.
All this to tell me that the redneck chicks in shorts and steel-toed boots are apparently smarter than me.