Another Hillary-ous

A man died and went to heaven.

As he stood in front of St. Peter atthe Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Hillary Clinton's clock?" asked the man.

"Hillary's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."


har har har

oh yeah

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Happy 5th Anniversary, honey!!




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Okay . . . so here's the deal

I have been out of pocket and kind of flying around everywhere (literally and mentally) because I was offered a job last week. On Thursday at lunch. While I was getting into my truck to be exact.

Now while job offers are no small thing even in the most mundane of professions, this job offer constituted a pretty big deal. In my life. In my current employment. In my husband's elected position. In our church. Pretty much in our whole town.

I won't go into all the gorey details but I will put it in bullet point format for ease of understanding (mainly because bullet points make it easier for ME):

• I currently work in our church office
• I do not make much $$ and there are no health insurance or retirement benefits
• I really love my job and the servant's posture it has allowed me to transition into
• I do not make hardly any $$
• New job pays A LOT
• New job pays for mine and the Bear's health insurance
• New job offers retirement fund
• New job also employs someone who had an affair with a married person
• That someone was also married at the time
• Both couples are members of our church
• Our town is very very very (did I mention) very small
• Ergo there are the "teams" who have picked sides of the affair to be on
• My husband is an ELECTED official
• Certain people on the "teams" might perceive my acceptance of the new job as support for the affairees
• New job is answer to prayer inasmuch as it pertains to income and benefits for my family
• New job is something that my strengths would allow me to be really really good at
• Did I mention how small our town is? If you don't already know someone it's because you're related to them.

So there you go. I am, of course, going to take the new job. It all feels "right" and maybe I am putting too much concern about the soap opera that has been front and center in our town for the past nine months into my deliberations. But my husband and I have tried very hard to walk the neutral line in our community. If we said it once, we said it one hundred times: "It is not our business and we are not going to speculate about ANYONE'S private lives."

See what I get for mentioning my life was uneventful?

I'm gonna try keeping my big yap shut for a while.

Catching Up to Do

I've been out of the loop for the past week or so but I plan on getting back into the swing today or tomorrow.

There have been some interesting developments going on in my life and I fully intend on sharing it all out here with you.

Like it or not.

I'll beeee right back . . . .

Hillary-ous

Al Gore and Bill and Hillary Clinton go to heaven.

God, sitting on his throne, addresses Al first. "Al, what do you believe in?"

Al replies, "Well, I believe that I won that election, but that it was your will that I did not serve. And I've come to understand that now."

God thinks for a second and says, "Very good. Come and sit at my left."

God then addresses Bill. "Bill, what do you believe in?"

Bill replies, "I believe in forgiveness. I've sinned, but I've never held a grudge against my fellow man, and I hope no grudges are held against me."

God thinks for a second and says, "You are forgiven, my son. Come and sit at my right."

Then God addresses Hillary. "Hillary, what do you believe in?"

She replies, "I believe you're in my chair."


har har har